What did the rat say to the dog? Nothing, he is a rat and therefore incapable of speech.

Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Daniel is a fag

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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