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every cloud has a silver lining

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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an emo girl walked into a white room

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops