When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

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A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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VITAMIN C!

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what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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