What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black —Stevie Wonder

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The duck didn't cross the road.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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what do you call a man who likes other men? A fag

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

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Sir, your wife is dead

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

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Redcunt? You got to try being nicer if you want a proper answer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops