If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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knock knock who's there? hope

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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djkldfnblfnbofgb

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

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Two black guys walked into a bar. And they killed everybody.

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops