A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because it is a horse and doesn't understand English. It gets confused about it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, upending a few tables along the way.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

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25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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What is worse than torture? Not much.

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yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

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9/11

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There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

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a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

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How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

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What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite lollipop? Choppa Chups.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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How to trick hundreds or religious people to drink cyanide? You establish a religious community in which you establish a ritual of drinking Kool-Aid once a day and one day switch the Kool-Aid with cyanide.

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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why did bill gates sue his banks? Because he can

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Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

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White NBA players.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops