There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

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why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Whats circular and black? a black circle.

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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What do a black man and a bench have in common? The black man can sit in the bench.

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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What did the basketball player do before he scored a basket? Shot the basket ball

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops