what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

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What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops