a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? several.

Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

Why was the homeless man begging for money? Because he needed money to buy liquer for his severe alcohol addiction that was slowly destroying his liver.

I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

I am a mime

A man walks into a bar... And orders a glass of beer to cool himself off after a long day at the quarry.

Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

Then none of us want to be right.

Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

Alien vs. Predator = Evil Staplers vs. Evil Jamaicans

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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