Why did Captain Obvious crossed the road? Because that's the name of the chicken

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your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

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A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

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Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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A man falls off a building and dies on Impact

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Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

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Knock, knock. After a couple minutes of waiting the man knows that no one is home and leaves.

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I kinda said I did not want to know, sooo... Want to meet up tomorrow? Like for realsies? In that case tell me first (then show me tomorrow as proof), your cough... Vagina, I dont care if its shaven or not, but does it have red hair?

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Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

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What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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Two Irish men walk in to a bar. Or maybe it was three. It's actually quite a common occurrence here in Dublin.

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Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

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Why was the Tortous and the Hare written? So fat people will feel good about themselves.

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Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops