They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

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Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense..............

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

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Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

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What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

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How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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