They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

Whats brown a sticky, shit

roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

Why are black people so dark? They originated from Africa

What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

Roses are Dead, Voilets are, too Now shut up and say nothing Because we're watching you

As I sat waiting for the doctor to return with my final prognosis, I began contemplating my own mortality. Looking inside myself, one question continued to haunt me: “What’s the X-ray technician going to do when he walks in and sees me messing with the equipment?”

If you have a stroke, call 000

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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