That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice titttttss.

What the the newly born male dog get for his first birthday? A loss of two testicles.

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

A guy walks into a bar

What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

Why are reading anti-jokes so funny? Im not sure, i just read them and laughter ensues.

Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? Ones a person and the others a bench.

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

Albert your flies undone.

I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

2 guys walk into a bar but the third one has known about what happens to the third guy but since he is reading this in a newspaper and his unaware of his surroundings he walks into the bar anyway and feels very foolish.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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