Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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Why does life hand you lemons? Because it sucks enough, so it wants you to have some.

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How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

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Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

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Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

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why is the black guy cross the rode. he did not' he got in a truck. i know it does not make s...

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

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whats green and smells like red paint? green paint

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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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That's funnier than a zebra climbing the Eiffel tower with Bill Clinton on the 4th night of quanza

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

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Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

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How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

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What did Rihanna remember when she corrected Chris Browns tweets she can't remember last thing she saw was a fist

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What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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