Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Yo mama so fat and ugly, I don't want to tell you how fat and ugly she is for fear of vomiting.

Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

A white man/women works behing the counter at a 7/11

An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist -Tag

Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

Q. Why was the little boy sad? A. He had a frog stapled to his face.

What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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