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Your mom's so fat... she probably needs to go on some sort of diet to avoid a serious heart condition and inevetible death

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

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As I was riding my bike down the road, I saw a young boy being raped in a dark alley way. I proceeded to pedal and acted like i had seen nothing.

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What do you call someone who kills a black man? A murderer

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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Chris is hairy

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

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You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

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What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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How do you keep kids off your lawn? You molest them.

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

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why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

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What's worse than having embaracing parents? A: they are of the same sex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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