What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Q: Why couldn't the black man swim? A: Because ever since he was a child, he has never taken swimming lessons before.

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Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

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oh my god! what? i heard this joke the other day and it was hilarious. ok, tell me? actually it doesn't matter i can't remember anyway.

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What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

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How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

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What did the German say to the Rabbi? Hello. The German was also Jewish

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bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

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A lion, a tiger, and a bear walk down the side of the road. This is what I observed last week in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

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yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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