What do you do at a club? You club.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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A blind child sign is at the end of my street. I have never seen the child, but at least if he were to come outside at the right time period i might be able to spot him, whereas he would having no way of returning the gesture.

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Do't you just hate when a sentence doesn't end how you think it will and it just octopus.

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There was a joke, one sentance, and no punchline.

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Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

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What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

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Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

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What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

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roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

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What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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