Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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Why did Colussi miss school for 2 years? -Because he died

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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what's Mexicans favourite sport? Cross country.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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Yo mom as so dumb.... That she has a low IQ

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How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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