Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

Shltskc gw? G

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

Whats the difference between a Bicycle and a duck? They Both have handlebars, except for the duck.

what's up? my penis.

What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

How many black people can you fit into a cardboard box? Depends on how big the box is.

A little boy was taken away in a black van with the promises of candy and a puppy of his very own. What he received? That fore mentioned, and more. The more? Ass rape

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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