What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

thumb_up thumb_down +6

stephen hawking walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

thumb_up thumb_down +6

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mother is average.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Barack Obama.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops