What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

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pull my finger (farts)

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

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Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

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A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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What does two plus two equal? 4

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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