God is like semen. They're both nouns.

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

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why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

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What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

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What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

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Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

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What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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