whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

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EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

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what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

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Jim bean takes out a can of- Let me guess- No.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

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star wars kid

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What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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