What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

If I tell you that seeing you happy, is my main motivation towards accepting right now, would you believe me?

Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

what does an adhd kid that causes all kind of trouble get? a buncha ass whoopins and some meds to dope his ass up

So a Priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into the bar... And got drinks. What did you think was going to happen?

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

What's under the first mate? The second mate.

What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Sittin' on the couch with the morning post With a cold cup of coffee and some boring toast Thinkin' I'm-a change it up, yeah that's always fun What you reckon, Remz? A McDonald's run So we hit the couch cushions, need some dollars, friend Yo, I found a five. Man, that's Canadian. How 'bout a loonie? A twonie? A spoon or The Goonies? Oh, it's 10:25. Dude, you gotta move, G. Got the cash, got the car, got the pedal to the floor Speed limit's 25, but I'm doing 34 Going drive-thru style, man it's fast express You can call it trans fat, I call it happiness Roll up to the teller fella with a minute to spare Frenchy with a headset, "can I take your order?" A McGriddle with a little sweet and sour there, son A McMuffin, then be stuffin' muffins up in my trunk Then a tray or two of hotcakes, man I can't decide, uh... All's I know is hit them things with Aunt Jemimah How 'bout an egg fajita for some Texas flavor No drama but my momma wants a breakfast bagel Don't forget my #4, or there'll be hell to spend And I want them eggs poached like an elephant Frenchy back on the line, "is that all your order?" No it ain't, fool, I want a Coca-Cola! Get my cup of Coke and I'm-a start a riot Cuz on the cup lid, dude depressed the "diet" Check his shirt tag, and I catch the name Brian, I ain't tryin' to drink aspartame Sittin' on the couch, 'bout an hour later Pickin' at a pouch of some Now n' Laters Hardly starving, man, but I find a hunch Start the car up fast because it's time for lunch It just takes two bucks and I get what I need Two beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese "Supersize Me" said he's had enough of it But how is it bad for my heart if I'm in love with it? If you never had McDonald's, heck, well dude you should It's a party, like a Hardee's, except the food is good Just don't get a large #2, I plead with you friend Cuz it'll be a large #2 when you see it again Enter the store, first you holla, then you Pick a couple items off the dollar menu Four hot McNuggets, dessert with custard Mix the sweet n' sour with a squirt of mustard. A Big Mac attack, you can max the lettuce Paying ain't a pain, they take cash or credit Want a water? You can pay up there for spring Or get the free Grimace cup--how embarassing They say, "you're playing with a cardiac arrest, my boy" Only thing bad for my heart's when they forget my toy Now I'm-a have a milkshake, but before you rant It's made of shamrocks--now that's a plant People say it's bad, but I don't believe them McDonald's is peace--just ask Tom Friedman Momma catch me with a 'zine, and she's screaming "stop! Don't you worry, Mom, it's just my man Ray Kroc

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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