why do fat people eat so much? who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Today I went to the grocery store. I purchased milk, eggs, orange juice, and my favorite breakfast cereal for $18.73. I subsequently got into my sedan and drove home.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a bar and asks for 6 vodka shots. The bartender looks at him in a strange manner. The man quickly downs all 6 of the vodka shots. The bartender looks at the man and says "Jeepers mate, whats the celebration?" The man replies "Well mate, first blow job today" The bartender in a kind gesture says "Here you go mate, next one is one me" while pouring another shot. The man respectfully replies, "No thanks mate, if 6 didn't get the taste away, im sure 7 won't"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did i do after u pinched me? i killed everyone

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Your mom is so fat that she should watch her weight and maintain a healthy diet.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

thumb_up thumb_down -14

your mom is so fat, she uses nutrisystem and other weight-loss systems to try to loose weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A giant meteor will hit the earth tomorrow.What do you do? Tell everyone I told you so.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's Black

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anybody else hate when people mispell words in jokes It ruins the joke Most them prob some scumbags Probs to Jeffrey K April 12, 2013 1:55 PM

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's racecar spelled backwards? Jesus.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I kinda said I did not want to know, sooo... Want to meet up tomorrow? Like for realsies? In that case tell me first (then show me tomorrow as proof), your cough... Vagina, I dont care if its shaven or not, but does it have red hair?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man falls off a building and dies on Impact

thumb_up thumb_down -14

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops