Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

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what would your nan do if she was alive right now? scratching the top of the coffin.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Get a giant scorpion to rape him.

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Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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What do astronauts do if the want a party? They planet

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

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There was a chicken. It squarked.

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Why are people in Africa dying? because the majority of them have a lack of food and fresh water which effects their health.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a cadilac driving over a cliff? They stole my car :(

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did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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A guy with a severe attention deficit walks into a bar and... oh, look, the sky is pretty... wait, what was I saying ?

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

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The guys Joke above me is funnier^.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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