A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

What's green and has wheels? Your mom.

What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

Why did the plane crash? The Pilot Wash a Loaf of Bread

Your girlfriend.

how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

Why is Texas so hot? The sun

Roses are Red Violets are Red Grass is Red Trees are Red My yard is on fire.

A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

What do you call a person driving a plane? Not a pilot, they fly planes.

How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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