What did john say to dave when his grandfather died ?

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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what does a slim jim taste like? there is no answer because everyone has a different amount of taste buds

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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What do you call a ginger in an oven? A ginger in an oven

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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Q: Why wasn't the baby playing with his blocks? A: Because his face was stapled to the floor

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Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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Advertiser: Charlies Tax---------- Advertiser: OMG, who are you... Pedobear: Hello kids, come in my taxi(Van) :D

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A girl and her friend got into a fight. They both bled to death.

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What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They don't speak to each other because muffins do not have the ability to make speech. After being in the oven for several minutes at 375 degrees, they are removed, left to cool, and were eaten. They were good.

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mmm i love marble bumhole

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Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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