How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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Q: Why did the Asian boy pass the math test? A: By studying with dedication to the field.

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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women's rights.

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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your mother is so fat that I am concerned that her health is at stake and she may develop diabetes and heart disease

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what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

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a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops