Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red, Violets are purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

thumb_up thumb_down -18

knock knock who's there Romney Romney Who? RON PAUL 2012

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why is a T-shirt like a topaz statue of the Archangel Gabriel? They both start with 'T'.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms? Because they weren't invented when he was alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops