A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? Where's my farmer??????

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

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24

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Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

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what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

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Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

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Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What did batman say to robin before getting into the bat mobile? Don't touch my penis.

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Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

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Do you know what is worse than getting kicked downstairs? Getting kicked upstairs because then you could fall downstairs and break your skull.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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