What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

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.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

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Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? That boy that dropped a perfectly good ice cream cone from a road accident involving a bus due to lack of road safety awareness Oh yeah, and I guess the fact that he probably died or was injured for life is pretty bad too

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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guess what>? your mum lol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops