Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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what is worse than a guy pissed?

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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How do you keep black people out of your backyard. A no trespassing sign.

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

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baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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What is the black stuff between elephants toes? Slow natives

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A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

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Albert your flies undone.

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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