How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

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If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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why did superman die, aids he got from wonder women

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Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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What is the similarity between an elephant and a grape? Absolutely nothing. One is an animal, while the other is a fruit.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

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What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

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Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

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Friend's are like penguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops