I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

A rapist and a little child walk through a dark forest. The little child says: "It's scary here." Rapist answers: "Tell me about, I gotta go back alone through here."

1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

What did the blackman say to the whiteman???? Nothing! They both commintted suicide

Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

if ruddel jumped on your back what do you do leave him on or pull him offf? shoot him.

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

What do porn stars do after they retire? No clue but some idiot made a movie about it.

Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

9/11

Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese.

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

Nickelback.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...