Yo mama's so fat, I gave her a compliment because we should embrace body acceptance.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

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Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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Why did the dog start barking? Because it was a dog.

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Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

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Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Are you okay? Here, let me take you to the hospital." The woman is now healing nicely.

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My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

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Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

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PENIS

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What did the kitten say to the ant? Nothing, it was dead. - Driiiftz

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What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

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What happened to the man who fell off a cliff? He fell

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prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

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You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

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Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

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Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god."

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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