Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

thumb_up thumb_down -16

ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

thumb_up thumb_down -16

knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

thumb_up thumb_down -16

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a book. A tree's leaves hit the trash cans

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti pick up line: Boy: If I could re arrange the letters I would put U and I together. Girl: Oh really because if I could rearrange the letters I would put F and U together By Adam Chebali

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

thumb_up thumb_down -16

yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops