What is white and long? A New York winter

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

Im Harold Camping.... and i enjoy scaring the shit out of you

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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