Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did the teacher say to his student? do your work.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q:Why did the black man fall down? A: he got hit in the face by a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats circular and black? a black circle.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I'm going to rewrite history. History.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +5

u know whats a crime? rape

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops