What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7.? Well 7 has suffered a tramatic brain injury, and has a tendancy to brutally attack anyone he comes in contact with. The whole situation is unfortunate.

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whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

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What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

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What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

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what did the ghost say to the bee boo-bee

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Why was the man "hanging around"? He committed suicide.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, as speaking to himself is a sign of mental illness.

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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