There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

what's the best way to get your younger sibling to stop being annoying? Shoot Him

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

Two People go To Africa They have a lovely time they come home then go to Miami Florida after Florida they decide to go to germany sadly there was a plane crash and the two men fell into a pit of acid.

A American seeking into mexico

once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion? Answer- Take me to your weeder!

Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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