Why doesn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it makes him mean.

A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

What did the asshole say to his friend behind him? Fart

what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

WOw you have no life

Get on the boat.

How did Mary fall off the swing? She got hit by a fridge.

Where do you find a pile of dead lawyers? In my basement.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt. Why do we have to live in a world where people have to be so concered about why a stupid chicken decides to cross a road. Shouldnt we all be more focused on ways to get a better economy, or maybe end world hunger?

Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

Why did the blonde go to law school? She was sick of people assuming that she was not an intelligent woman due to negative sterotypes about her gender and hair color and set out to prove said people wrong.

Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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