What's big and grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

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Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

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(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

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My mom says hi ............ Jk she says hello

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

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How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? I don't know really

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WNBA

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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