A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

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Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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