A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

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Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

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What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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