Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

1+1=2

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

9/11

what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

Roses are red Violets are blue Call the cops girl They can't unrape you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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