What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

what happens when a panther and a gorilla fight? i dont know i never seen it before.

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

What did the very inquisitive poor black guy say to the very rich white man at the train station? Nothing, they didn't know each other. And they both had their iPods in. And they were at different train stations. And they were in different countries. And the black guy died 20 years ago.

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

Three gay men walk into a bar and there is only one three-legged stool. What do they do? --One man politely tells one of the other men to have a seat and then the two remaining men leave and have a one-night stand.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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