What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

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A man walks into a bar. He is now passed out on the ground. (TD)

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Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

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Why could the red heading boy sing higher notes than the blonde headed boy? He was castrated at birth.

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops