You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

thumb_up thumb_down +43

a man was shot.... he died

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Nobody because Repeat is a good friend and he went in after Pete.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

all your base are belong to mark

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the chicken cross the road? He actaully never did. He only made it half way before a cop issued him with an infringement notice for jaywalking.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

thumb_up thumb_down +31

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops